


Awakening

by BlazingOut



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Caring Jean, Cheating, Conflicted Love, F/F, F/M, M/M, Smut, Underage Drinking, Underage Sex, i suck at tags sorry, lots of feels, stubborn eren
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-07
Updated: 2018-11-10
Packaged: 2019-08-20 09:15:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death, Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,559
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16553039
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlazingOut/pseuds/BlazingOut
Summary: Jean worshipped from afar, seeing the sparkle in her eyes and the light smile. Only it would never be for him.Takes place a little after Erens first transformation. And Marco doesn’t die.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello fellow shippers, I’m not very good at writing, but I rarely see Jean and Mikasa and they’re honestly my otp. There are other ships, I just didn’t tag them because I hate searching for them and seeing they’re a side ship. Anyway I hope you enjoy. Criticism is welcome

She stumbled into her dim room. Clutching her chest as she plopped on the bed. Staring up blankly at the ceiling as tears trickled past her eyes, but she kept her emotionless gaze. Not too long ago, after Armin saved them from cannon fire with only is words, Eren told her he didn’t need her, didn’t want her. He could look after himself after all. He wasn’t her  _brother._

 

Mikasa scoffed as she replayed that word in her head. She meant nothing more to him and that’s all she ever be. Just an annoying girl that won’t give him any space. This was supposed to be a happy time, finding out he wasn’t dead. Just that he had an abnormal power. Not that she minded it. She sighed again and wiped her tears softly. Only Eren could make her so emotional, so **weak**. She thought of it as a blessing and a curse. He could make her feel again, live again, experience things she missed and enjoy life, but he could tear her down without a second thought.

 

She got up and approached her window. His room was only a few doors down, yet his bed would be empty. He decided to go with the Survey Corps and leave her, again. She never understood why she could never be enough. _Am I really that useless._ The black haired girl shook her head and took in the beautiful atmosphere of the sky. It caused a goofy smile to apear, she could enjoy some things on her own, she was human after all.

 

A low knock interrupted her thoughts. She hesitately got up and opened the door to a fimilar blonde and a tall figure behind him. She stayed silent as they entered her room. It almost bothered her how they barged in. _Is this what Eren felt like around me?_  She became sad at the thought. “Mikasa.” Armin broke the slince. His voice drenched in worry. “You two could get in serious trouble coming to a girls room after hours.” She was surprised at how demanding her voice sounded at a time like this. Armin was quick with is response. “We were just worried about you, you left so fast and you looked upset.” He spoke with such a gentle smile. “We?” Mikasa questioned. Jean doesn’t care about her well being, if he did in the slightest he would take Eren’s feelings into consideration whenever he decided to be an ass. He knew how much it would upset Mikasa.

 

The tall boy cough nervously. “I came to make sure my comrade was okay, it’s rare to see you in such distress.” He sounded genuinely concerned. Mikasa dropped her head in shame, “I’m sorry to have scared you guys. We have bigger things to be focusing our time on.” The quietness in her voice seemed to anger Jean. “The maniac is the one that needs to apologize, you were only trying to protect him and if he can’t sense that then it’s you that needs to refocus the things you spend time on-“, “Jean, enough.” Armin said firmly, trying to defend his childhood friend, “she doesn’t need to feel worse.” Jean’s mouth opened slightly, but he soon dropped his glare and rubbed his eyes, “I’m sorry, Mika.” Mikasa felt confused by the sudden nickname. “I’m in over my head. I don’t know the first thing about comforting people.”

 

“How about I let you practice?” Armin said boldly, “I still owe the others an explanation about Eren and they’re not letting up, I’ll be back as soon as I can.” Armin shot up and headed to the door, not giving either of them a chance to speak. “Please Jean, take care of Mikasa, she’s fragile right now.” He shut the door behind him with a smirk.

 

Jean was frozen in shock. _How could he just leave? Without a thought._  He turned his gazed to Mikasa, she looked so calm and perfect. _How is Eren able to faze this girl?_  He shook his head and sighed heavily. What to say, what to do. How could he possibly make her feel better? They were both alone, in the silence of her room.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I probably should’ve mentioned that the plot is pretty different, (it’s a fanfic so of course) but I didn’t want confusion. I’m also sorry the first chapter was so short, I was in a rush to get it out.

They both looked at each other in quick glances, not sure what to say to each other. Jean admired how strong, level headed, and calm she was able to remain, especially at a time like this.  _Maybe she was just use to him leaving. That jackass._

 

Jean became more uncomfortable as the seconds seemed to drag on, but he soon noticed how Mikasa’s eyes began to wonder, now gazing out the window. Paying him no mind. _So peaceful_. He smiled gently and spoke slowly. “Beautiful right?” He shared the moment with her, them both looking at the warm sunset. “I never get tired of drifting away from reality to get lost in that never ending sky.”

 

Him speaking broke Mikasa’s thought, she almost forgot he was still in the room. He spoke so poetic, she was ‘impressed’, sorta, she couldn’t think of the right word. She just wanted to continue listening to him, she wasn’t aware he could talk with such meaning behind his words. Maybe it’s because she liked that they had a common interest. He continued, “It makes me feel safe I guess. The lights are so bright and lively. It puts that weird feeling in my stomach.” Mikasa wasn’t staring at the sky anymore. She was staring at Jean.

 

His golden eyes reflected the sun so perfectly, his sharp face, his buzz cut light brown hair. Mikasa couldn’t quite put her finger on it. _Eren._ Her eyes became sad, she hadn’t been thinking about him this whole time. She was too caught up in Jean’s words. She felt so silly, she really needed to regain her focus, but it all seemed so pointless in this moment. She was capable of living and feeling something with someone other then Eren right?

 

”It’s part of my home.” Mikasa whispered, turning her attention back to the falling sun. Jean chuckled, “Only part?” He questioned, he was happy to get her talking. “Well there’s Eren.” Jeans happy nature began to fade. “He’s always been there for me, he taught me how to live with a purpose. Now? Now he doesn’t want me around.” Mikasa’s eyes started to tingle, there she goes again, getting emotional. “All I try to do is protect him, he’s the only family I have left and he spat it back in my face, in front of everyone.” Mikasa looked down in her lap.

 

Jean could understand her feelings and another part of him couldn’t. He treats her like trash and doesn’t appreciate her love in the slightest. She gives him her all and he gives her attitude. How does she continue to keep fighting for him? _He’s too stubborn to realize how lucky he is._ Jean cleared his throat and calmed his breathing. Only Eren could rip a beautiful moment away from him. He wasn’t sure exactly what to say, hes never dealt with Mikasa in distress. His first instinct was to hug her, but he didn’t want to over step any boundaries.

 

”You have so much to offer this world. You’re one of humanity’s strongest to everyone else, but to me? I see the person you are. I see the girl behind the title. The soft spoken girl that adores the sky and wants nothing more then to have a family. I’m sorry all Eren can see is your fighting skills and that’s why he’s jealous of you, but if he can’t take the time to think about who you really are, he’s gonna lose you. One day you will find the home and family you’ve always wanted. Just don’t give up hope Mika.”

 

 _Mika._  She lightly smiled at the nickname while she let his words sink in. A family and a home is all she ever wanted. How did Jean know her so well? She looked up slowly with a pure smile. Something Jean felt so blessed to be looking at and it was directed at him, for him. “Thank you Jean.” She said quietly. “I’ve never met someone that knows me so well, but I’m glad to have you here for me.” Her smile never died down.

 

Jean remember being so nervous to say anything a few minutes ago and now he felt proud. His words sparked something in what many people thought of as the emotionless badass. Their eyes met. Gold to black. “You’ll always have me, Mika.” He didn’t mean to sound so creepy, but she didn’t seem to mind. They just continued to stare at each other as the light from outside completely settled over the towering wall. Mikasa turned her sight.

 

”Looks like we missed the show.” Mikasa stated sadly. “Don’t worry,” Jean said getting up, “we have the rest of our lives to watch it.” That made her warm inside. Eren never liked watching the sky with her.

 

Jean approached her door without looking back, if he did he was afraid he wouldn’t leave. “But it’s late and I should go, I need to find Armin. He should’ve been back by now and I don’t want to get in more trouble by being here.” He still didn’t look back. “Hang in there. Goodnight Mika.”

 

”Goodnight Jean.” With that, he was gone.


End file.
